Scott and I have a funny thing we do when we are peeved at the other person, we say "I Love You" followed by a hug or a kiss. Lately I've noticed that I've started doing the same thing to Molly. I admit that it is a passive aggressive but it is also a re-set, a way to remember that even when they are driving me NUTS, that I do love both of them.
Ever since I found out I was pregnant with Molly, I've been thinking about how I want her raised. I want her to know love and happiness. I want her to grow up in a house filled with laughter but to also not be afraid of conflict. I want her to be confident and strong.
At our swimming class, one of the mothers recently called her enthusiastic and confident. Hearing that made me so happy because really she is enthusiastic and confident (or in other words, tiring and exhaustingly stubborn). She really believes that she can do anything, even if that anything involves flinging herself down the front concrete steps (there might be some areas for improvement in the keeping ones self safe while being confident in ones abilities arena).
I think about how Molly is growing up a lot and what I can do to help her along her journey of life. So far, I think it is going pretty well. I mean, there are things we can do to be better parents. For instance, Molly is going through a very loving stage where she wants to HUG ALL THE KIDS! But not all the kids want to be hugged by Molly. She doesn't understand that because in her mind, EVERYONE LOVES THE MOLLY! I'm sure they do but I'm trying to teach her that sometimes people love with less intensity and less yelling. And then I remember that I grab her tight and squeeze her hard while yelling, I LOVE YOU! which reminds me that I really need to lead by example.
I love that Molly is so sure of herself though. Her walk even has a cocky little swagger. She really is her Mother's daughter and that is a frightening thought at times. My Mother's curse might have come true. I may have ended up with a child just as exhausting as myself.
HUG ALL THE KIDS! Love it. I think most kids go through that stage of nonexsistent personal boundaries.
ReplyDeleteNeat that you made a connection between your I Love You habit and Molly's hug addiction. I also think it's great to have a funny way to exit an argument. Byron and I do it too. Ours is harder to explain but one of us usually starts talking wildly and sarcasticly about doing the the thing that we (probably me) were just fussing about/arguing against. That signals that it is time to be silly and get over ourselves.